2)How did the telephone propose to the lady?
It gave her a ring!
3)An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time.
"I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman enquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all 15 of your paintings."
"That's wonderful," the artist exclaimed. "What's the bad news?""The guy was your doctor..."
4)why did micheal jackson go to k mart
because boys paints were half off.
Nurse: "No. Is it missing?"
6) Yo momma so poor, she bounces food stamps.
7) Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
8) Why are there gates around graveyards?
Because everybody is DYING to get in!
9) What do you get if you mix a car, a fly, and a dog?
A flying carpet!
10) Why did the boy put lipstick on his head?
Because he wanted to make up his mind!
11) What do you get when you a cross a vampire with a snowman?
Frostbite!
12) What do you call a fish without eyes?
A fsh!
13)What did the football coach say to the banker?
I want my quarter back
14) What book was once owned by only the wealthy, but now everyone can have it?You can't buy it in a bookstore or take it from a library.A telephone book.
15)What goes up and never comes down?Your age
16) What has to be broken before it can be used?An egg
17) What has to be broken before it can be used?An egg
18) You heard me before, yet you hear me again. Then I die, 'til you call me again.
19)What am I?An echoWhat has no beginning, end, or middle?A doughnut.
20) If you have it, you want to share it. If you share it, you don't have it. What is it?A secret
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